05/20/3029

My apologies for my not so daily posts. Life been a little crazy(in a good way for once).

I’m kind of proud of myself this past long weekend. It was super busy at work (we were at capacity) and I didn’t even have a panic attack at all the whole weekend. which I need to pat myself on the back for that one. Normally my anxiety attacks would get so bad I would have to go home “sick”.

I’m sure your asking how i accomplished such greatness in a few months. Well, the truth is I’m an from a different planet and my tin foil hat cures all! just joking! haha

I finally checked into st. lenords (mental health services) and signed up for some counseling/groups. So I have a normal councilor, art therapy and I also attend a few other groups they offer. So I suggest if you are having a hard time dealing with anything. Its always good to talk to someone and seek out the proper treatment you need. Its helped me be a functioning adult. I also take medication (ciperlex and adivan).

But just rember, The big guy in the sky (or what ever you believe in) put you on this earth for a reason and made you in his/her eye. If everyone was the same. life would be extremely boring.

my cravings for blow are pretty strong today. I realized that its been a year since my friend lia died from an feni overdose. It really hurts inside because a few weeks before she past away. She showed up at my high out of her mind and asking to come inside to my apartment.. I instead came down stairs and tried to talk to her.. Sadly, the drugs got a hold of her and she just stormed off when I asked if there was anything i can do to help her get sober.

It always bothered me to this day. What if I let her in and got her sober. she was such a sweet heart.

I know what your thinking. “Why the hell would you go do drugs when your friend died from an overdose?” Well, If It was a 8 months ago. I would of been high af and forgetting my problems.

I know deep down that dosn’t solve anything and my problems are still there when the high is over. So I’m writing in this blog, having a coffee and playing video games instead. I also have a meeting with my counselor,groups and meetings in this week. So George will be keeping busy and staying out of trouble :).

Anyhow, I’ll go back to playing video games and ill post more i promise. stay safe all/.